Tater Patch in Weeds

Weedy Tater Patch

Would you look at this mess? This is my tater patch which has two rows, each 24 feet long. It has a pineapple plant, a watermelon plant, and a bunch of sweet potato vines. Obviously, it’s trying to trash my reputation as a Better Homes & Garden gardener. There’s not much I can do about it being over-run with Dollar Weed. That’s just a given. You can’t kill the stuff. That heavy encroachment of St. Augustine grass, however, indicates a tater patch having fallen victim to neglect.

I won’t kid you. I could use some help right now as I switch from spring to summer gardening. The gleeful Dollar Weed requires me to plow every row or partial row being switched over. I suffer with neck, shoulder and back pain from a spring 2011 auto accident when an old geezer slammed into the back of my car at 50 mph. I can no longer do hand plowing for any length of time. So I got the bright idea that maybe I could get Poppie to edge the St. Augustine grass and then we could plant the grass runners in his sizeable patch of dirt that had fallen victim to one of those unfortunate yard accidents, details not forthcoming. I had already plugged his dirt patch and added runners but it could use a few more runners to help it fill in quicker. I broached my bright idea to him.

“My edger’s broke,” he said, as if he could do nothing further.

I looked at him in bug-eyed disbelief. My poor eyeballs  popped out of their sockets and dribbled back and forth like  too many basketballs at court.

“You’ve still got a MANUAL one,” I screeched. “Matter of fact, we’ve got at least two of them around here.”

He stood there mute for a minute and then changed the subject.

That, of course, does not bode well for me getting any help. You’ve heard it a thousand times – you just can’t get good help these days.