Post last updated: October 10th, 2018

On Monday, I noticed two hummingbirds working the Blue Black Salvia in the wildflower bed across from my porch. There was probably a good ten feet between them and my rocking chair on the porch. This was good. You will recall from Birdfeeder that I don’t like these insect birds getting too close.

Blue Black Salvia
Blue Black Salvia

Yesterday, I was standing on my porch fussing over a potted petunia on the railing. This is my first year with petunias and I’m struggling to understand them. All of a sudden, I heard a loud buzzing noise in my left ear. I turned my head towards the porch post. Next to the hummingbird feeder hanging from the post was one of those beady-eyed hummingbirds with his long, black beak pointed at my face.  Less than three feet from my face. He audaciously gave me an indignant buzz that practically shouted, WHERE’S THE GRUB?

Aggggghhhhh. I wish I could have seen the grimace on my face. I’ll bet I looked like some old bag in a haunted house the moment she sees the mummy with loose wrappers fumbling in her direction. Thankfully, my horror-stricken expression scared the hummer off. I looked at the hummingbird feeder. Empty.

Pretending that I was feeding the wildlife is over. The wildlife has found the grub, expects the grub to be on tap, and gives me a run for the haunted house when the grub runs out.  Why do I do these things to myself?


  1. I would so much like to have them come to my yard but NO they go across town to your yard so you can make faces at them. So they deserve what they get!

  2. Where are your big girl panties?? I know you have a pair of purple ones… Those little critters are not gonna hurt you. They are tough, interesting creatures of beauty!! They dive bomb me all the time. I just tell them I’m the one that fills the feeders!! They smile and nod, act like they are looking at the roses or something. No problem!

    1. Big girl panties don’t help me when it comes to lizards, snakes, and hummingbirds. Funny you should mention the dive bombing. I was afraid that thing was going to do that to me until my ugly face scared him away.

  3. I am amazed how such small birds can be so aggressive. I have to have a feeder for both of the hummingbirds in my garden and if the feeders run dry they come to the sliding glass door to show their disdain and displeasure, they are not shy.

  4. Too funny Jones. Lawd what I wouldn’t give to have hummers that close! Them purple panties you have are too small (according to you), what say I send ya a pair in a larger size you could arm yourself with ’em while playing with the hummers:)

  5. Our hummers are quite vocal about their grub as you call it. We refer to it as the secret sauce. I’m so glad you have visitors. I have visions of them getting into your personal space. Gives me a twisted sense of joy. xo

    1. Well Kimmie, I have to call it grub. If I called it what it is – SUGAR – I’d have to get a signed release from those birds. Sugar causes all kinds of health problems. As long as I do like corporate america and assign the sugar a different name, the birds can’t hold me liable. As for your twisted sense of joy at my expense, well, I love you, too.

  6. Once again you show how certifiably crazy you are! Try taking pictures of them when they get that close – it will give you a new appreciation for them that has nothing to do with mummies.

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