Post last updated: October 11th, 2018
I don’t know why I do these things to myself. You’d think I’d learn. I brought a box of mail order daylilies into the house to open the box. This is the sort of thing a reasonable person would open up OUTSIDE the house because daylilies are live plants.
Nope, I take the box into the living room and plop it right there on top of the Bible on my lamp table. I proceed to cut the box open, and start pulling out the wadded up newspaper to separate the daylilies from the newspaper.
Then I start cleaning up the mess. I noticed a twig that fell out of the box and just as I was reaching towards it with outstretched thumb and finger, that twig moved. Oh my heavenly stars, you should have heard the screaming that commenced. I think it might have been me because I was the only one in the house but I’m not sure. I was too freaked out to pay much attention to screaming when I was hyperventilating.
It was a WORM! Inside my house. Probably the kind of worm that MULTIPLIES by itself. I’m not an expert on worms but it looked suspiciously like a red wiggler and he was headed for the edge of the lamp table. If a red worm fell off the table onto my reddish-burgundy carpet, he’d be a goner. I could just add him to the list of critters that got away and are now living in this house with me.
Like that polka-dotted albino see-thru lizard that dropped in the other night when I opened the door to let Whiskey the Cat in. That episode resulted in the discontinuation of late night doorman services for cats.
There was only one thing to be done and it had to be done immediately. Somebody had to scoop up that worm into some of that wadded up newspaper before the worm went over Niagara Falls. And what did that somebody have handy? A finger! AGGGGGHHHHH, you should have heard the gagging noises. I now have one red wiggler joining all the earthworms in my flower bed but I did it, brothers and sisters. I touched that worm!
As if the worm in the box wasn’t bad enough, I went outside Sunday to plant two orders of daylilies and what do I see? A smashed-up daylily with the day’s fresh bloom torn off. Some critter with a fat butt apparently plopped down in the middle of the plant.